5 steps to stop holding yourself back and start realising your self worth

Self-limiting beliefs can be one of your biggest enemies in believing in your own self-worth. You may find that you have a nagging inner voice holding you back that tells you that you’re just ‘not enough’ to achieve all those passionate dreams you have.

But ladies, it’s about time you stopped listening to those (wrong!) voices and crushing your own self confidence in the process!

There will likely be many opportunities that you come across that you’ll end up talking yourself out of. You know what I mean, there will be that promotion that comes up that you’d be ideal for, but you’ll convince yourself you haven’t got enough experience.

Or there will be a dating app you’d like to try but you just aren’t exciting or confident enough to put yourself out there.

Or there might be an old school favourite sport you’d love to play again, but you’re just not fit enough to run around with the net/foot/rugby ball anymore (this was an actual real life example for me FYI).

These can all sound like legitimate reasons not to try. If you want them to be.

In reality they are excuses to stay within your comfort zone to avoid failing and taking a hit to your self-esteem. But that is only one way to look at it – I mean what if you succeed?

What if you ace the interview for that dream job or meet the love of your life?! Or perhaps you’re harbouring some crazy sporting skills you never knew existed (didn’t happen for me, but it could of!). How insanely, crazy fantastic would that feel? Almost seems worth ignoring that stupid inner voice for doesn’t it?

Good - because that’s what we’re going to do. Below you’ll find a practical exercise to try anytime that nagging inner voice starts to jeopardise your self-belief, so that you’re ready to grab that next opportunity with both confident hands!

5 steps to overcome your limiting self-beliefs:

Step 1: Write down the one thing you really want for yourself that you’re holding yourself back from doing e.g:

I want to go for that promotion

Step 2: Now write down the limiting belief that is stopping you e.g:

I’m a junior member of the team and so I’m not experienced enough

Step 3: Now write down all the reasons why that just can’t be true (if it helps think about what you might say to friend who was in the same position and needed a confidence boost) e.g:

  • I have all the skills they are looking for, whether in my work or home life

  • I often get praised for completing work higher than my pay grade

  • I am a quicker learner and so I could fill any gaps super quickly

  • I know how this company works and have some great ideas I can bring to the table

  • XX was junior and still got promoted

Step 4: Now close your eyes and think about what you would see, what you would hear and how you would feel if you succeeded in that goal e.g:

I would see my email signature with my new role title (now write down the title), I would hear people congratulating me for acing my interview and that they knew I could do it, I would feel so confident and proud of myself for going after my dream

Feels good doesn’t it?! Now take one final step:

Step 5: Write down your new positive belief that is 100% true and more worthwhile believing in e.g:

I am a strong, confident woman who can ace an interview for this promotion because I have all the experience they’ve asked for and regularly perform above and beyond. I have some great ideas to improve the company and can really add a lot of value!

How much better does that belief feel?! And it’s easy to believe right because you’ve just written down all the reasons why it is completely true!

Now put this somewhere you will see it every day. Scrawled on your mirror, snapped to your phone, sticky noted to your laptop – wherever you will see it every day to remind yourself to listen to that positive voice telling you just how capable you really are xx

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